On My Eye in April
Come for the red bag edit, stay for the shopping wisdom from the unlikeliest of sources
Shitters. I’m currently reading a book called The Tell by Amy Griffin. Depending on who you follow, it may or may not be all over your feeds. It’s a memoir by a beautiful, wealthy, incredibly successful venture capitalist (who I knew of via her big circle of celebrity friends) about what is perhaps the last thing you would expect someone like that to write about—trauma, the lengths our brains will go to try to and protect us from it, and what happens after you unearth it.
I mention it for two reasons. 1) It’s a captivating read recommended by everyone from Bessel van der Kolk to Oprah (and now me), and 2) in it, Amy shares a piece of wisdom from her husband, (hedge fund billionaire) John Griffin: “Long no, short yes.” She calls it his philosophy in all things: “...if he found himself deliberating, equivocating, and questioning a decision—if it took him a long time to reach a conclusion—the answer was no. If he quickly and definitively committed to something, the answer was yes.”
I don’t always live by this adage (especially when it comes to a Sunday night takeout order…), but when I think back to some of the biggest decisions in my life, the yeses were immediate. Of course I was moving across the country to work for a podcast startup at 23, never mind that all my friends and the magazines I’d always wanted to work at were here in New York. I suppose that was one of the biggest decisions I’ve ever made, but also one of the easiest. Some no’s were quick too, but the path to some of my biggest ones involved so much deliberation and mental gymnastics that, in hindsight, was telling.
The decisions we make while shopping are minuscule in comparison, but in assessing my short yeses, I was reminded too of some of the bigger purchases I’ve made. Normally I’m a deliberator, perhaps to a fault. But many of my favorite splurges (and pieces in general) were immediate, instinctual yeses. Yeses that I felt very little anxiety about committing to, sometimes despite significant expense.
I’m trying to remember this when I linger on maybes, while shopping and otherwise. I have good instincts that have served me well, and I know how quickly they respond when something is right. You probably do too! They get stronger the more we exercise the muscle of using/trusting them.
The things in these monthly On My Eye letters are among several that pique my interest at any given time, but I curate them based on my most definitive yeses. Today’s includes spring style picks and an edit of red bags (mostly under $250) that I would snap up in heartbeat. I hope you find something you feel an immediate yes about too!
Other things I’m enjoying right now: Bone broth rice. Raazi Tea. My new “sports sweatshirt” (this is the perfect shade of blue for the Knicks, the Cubs, the Dodgers, the Mets, the Rangers, etc., and is very comfy). The cord cover I finally put on my TV after living in my apartment for a year and a half. ResX’s April Fools notification (I got GOT and laughed out loud). Canadian tuxedos (I sized up to a UK10, but wish I went up one more). This body serum (it has notes of cedar and sandalwood, and freshness from the juniper). Putting tabs in the new additions to my cookbook collection. This retractable lip liner with a built in sharpener (brilliant)—this color is my favorite. TruFru!
